Lord-willing, I will be running in my first full-marathon on Saturday, April 9, which is coming up in about seven weeks. Last Friday I ran eighteen miles in my training plan, which is the most I have ever run in one setting. The more training I experience for this race, the more I appreciate every tiny mental and physical detail of my preparation. I also become more aware of how concepts like planning in light of endurance, determination and its affect on specific aspects of success, perseverance over exhaustion or doubt, and faith through unknown variables play a part in all of my life -- from my faith, to my wifehood, to my parenting, to our future plans.
Planning out my weekly activities involves following the training plan I downloaded at CoachJenny.com, as well as tweaking it based on how I feel from workout session to workout session. Since this is my first full-marathon, I am following a beginner plan. Since I have had more success in my first two half-marathons than I expected before my racing adventures began, I have also been asking experienced acquaintances for advice about pushing myself a little farther than the beginner training plan takes me. Not much farther, because I don't want to hit THE WALL, but just a little. Not knowing what the future holds (my ignorance of what it will actually feel like to go 26.2 miles, whether the weather will be cool or way too warm that day, if I will have to nurse sensitive almost-injuries, etc.), drives me bananas. This requires so much self control in my thoughts and in my body. I keep reading about how I have to hold myself back for most of the race to make it until the end, but I also want to push myself just a little because I will be right on the line of qualifying for Boston at this marathon. Right.on.the.line. Unless it's hot, and then I will just be happy to finish and survive. Ha! What is the balance between taking risks and playing it safe?! I ask myself this as I plan for our homeschool, as we talk about building a cabin, when it comes to making new friends in this crazy world of wireless connections. Bah!
Determination is so important to persevering toward success. Running is truly a joy for me, so it's easy to commit to it. I won't say getting up in the dark mornings is easy, but I know I'll enjoy it, so envisioning it ahead of time helps me do it. Knowing which day requires which workout (recovery run or cross-training or speed session or long run, etc.) and where I will be (either in my running room or outside or at a gym) and at what time specifically helps me succeed. Vision is so important to my success, being able to play it out in my head and imagine everything gets me there, even/especially when it's hard because of tiredness or weakness. And committing to this over a period of time, for the last half of my reminds me how much better it feels to do it than not to do it.
Faith through the unknown variables has become such a challenge for me mentally, and it makes me so emotional. Bah! I mentioned it before, but I am so nervous because I can't predict or control the weather for race day. In a Tennessee April, the day could be cloudy and 55 or 60 OR it could be sunny and 85. The temperature will certainly affect my speed that day. It could make a half-hour or more difference in my finishing time. Bah! But I guess that's kinda what makes it fun too -- the challenge, right?
Okay, so I have two half marathons under my belt : 01:45:15 in October 2015 and 01:38:00 in February (this year:2016). I can qualify for the Boston Marathon if I complete the full in 03:35:00, and I need to get it in at least two minutes less than that, hopefully three or more, because they have started cutting off the qualifying time to accommodate ALL the qualifiers. I didn't even consider this a possibility until I did well at my halfs. Before, I just wanted to finish in under four hours. If it's a cool day, I really do think I have a chance to qualify, but if it's hot... whew! The BIG IF! I will just keep training and enduring through discomfort and do my best on that day. And I can always keep trying. Looking forward, always looking forward, intentionally crawling out of pits of self-pity or -doubt.
My foot. That foot. The one that bothered me during my first half-marathon. Oh, that foot. I think it's plantars fasciitis, but, honestly, it isn't THAT bad, it's just almost bad. It has been bugging me this week, since my eighteen-miler. I know I'll have to nurse it through the marathon with ice and stretching. The good news is that it is stronger because I didn't feel at all during my second half-marathon training. It can handle more mileage and speed... I'll just keep running and pushing the limits.
Preparing for this marathon is helping me deal with the marathon of life. Parenting is challenging. Planning for my children's futures (homeschool, sports, friends, etc.) and overcoming my anxieties of being around new people (so that hopefully my kids won't struggle in that) are huge deals for me. I am exhausted. But if I can push from mile 16 to 18, even though all the muscles in my body just wanna crash, then I can talk to that new person or learn about this new thing. Right??? Running is way easier than life.
God's words, the words of LIFE, have some pretty good advice based on running metaphors. I want to reiterate every single time that I talk about my faith and running that I don't feel like God needs to me to win to achieve HIS glory. Running is a tangible practice in my life to learn more about God's goodness and grace for me and the world in so many aspects. The following passages are as true to my everyday, mundane mom life as they are to my running. More importantly, they are true for my faith as it faces all sorts of cynicism and doubt and failure (from within and without). Thank you, Father, for living in me and not giving up on me. The sky is the limit. I am where I am today, and I want to walk with You in all the tomorrows, where'er You lead me.
Hebrews 12:1-2:: Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us,2 looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God.
Philippians 3:14-16:: I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus. 15 Let those of us who are mature think this way, and if in anything you think otherwise, God will reveal that also to you. 16 Only let us hold true to what we have attained.
1 Corinthians 9: 24-27:: Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one receives the prize? So run that you may obtain it. 25 Every athlete exercises self-control in all things. They do it to receive a perishable wreath, but we an imperishable. 26 So I do not run aimlessly; I do not box as one beating the air. 27 But I discipline my body and keep it under control, lest after preaching to others I myself should be disqualified.
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